Gratitude
These last couple of days have been incredible! I must have done something right because I have met a few truly wonderful people and have received a lots of gifts, both material and spiritual. Feels like I have been guided to meet them, me who usually is a loner and can't really be bothered meeting and making new friends.
I have been seeing beautiful sunsets, have had feasts in nice company, got to know a boy and a white cat, treatments, business proposals, finding a violin and bouzouki player and be given a private concert in a bakery shop, wise men and women sharing their life experiences to help me see more clearly, to be stronger and to be proud of who I am...
I don't want to make this into an Oscar nomination and I feel that I'm getting very sentimental but I just have to express my gratitude for all this. Sometimes it takes years to experience this much happiness and joy... Also I have to let myself being sentimental and express my feelings, it's just the way I am. During the years I have received many "complaints" because of my intensity...well, now I know better, so take it or leave it. I've found that some people are able to see through that and see the "real" me. Or at least making an effort to see the real me.
Now I'm ready to go home and face whatever comes.
By the way, right now they are playing "I just wanna be close to you" at the cafe' I'm sitting at (usually they have better taste :) ). Yes, it IS very banal, I am aware of that, but oh how I long to have someone to think of when I hear this song...
I have been seeing beautiful sunsets, have had feasts in nice company, got to know a boy and a white cat, treatments, business proposals, finding a violin and bouzouki player and be given a private concert in a bakery shop, wise men and women sharing their life experiences to help me see more clearly, to be stronger and to be proud of who I am...
I don't want to make this into an Oscar nomination and I feel that I'm getting very sentimental but I just have to express my gratitude for all this. Sometimes it takes years to experience this much happiness and joy... Also I have to let myself being sentimental and express my feelings, it's just the way I am. During the years I have received many "complaints" because of my intensity...well, now I know better, so take it or leave it. I've found that some people are able to see through that and see the "real" me. Or at least making an effort to see the real me.
Now I'm ready to go home and face whatever comes.
By the way, right now they are playing "I just wanna be close to you" at the cafe' I'm sitting at (usually they have better taste :) ). Yes, it IS very banal, I am aware of that, but oh how I long to have someone to think of when I hear this song...
Comments
You most definitely are who you are, be proud of that - and if it doesn´t please someone else than so be it...take it or leave it, as you say.
I have to say though that I really lack people in my life seeing the "real" me or even those trying to make an effort.
I´m beginning slowly and sometimes painfully to face that it might be a fact til my dying day. Maybe that´s just the way it is meant to be, karma.
Sometimes it brings me a sense of sorrow because I long for those kinds of intimate soulful relationships...
I see them in the movies, I read about them in books, I hear their lyrics in the songs I listen to.
Maybe it´s all just a myth though? I´m almost beginning to think that (in my darkest moments).
Anyway...I don´t think it matters anymore. Eh, yeah right. =)
I´m really though trying accepting life as it is, come what may. Go with the flow.
It´s really important to me come to terms with these things, to avoid feeling pain in my heart or bitterness over lost opportunities witch should be the worst case scenario at all costs and have ruined many a life throughout history.
Hm...sorry for the long comment. ;)
Wish you a safe journey home. You are awaited!
Peace and love from Mr Hotpants
Why am I not surprized about the long comment?;) You know I like long comments too, thanks you for taking you time.
It is not a myth,there are so many beautiful people out there and I wish you from the bottom of my heart that you would meet some! I have a feeling that you do deserve it (well, in fact I reckon everybody deserves it) because it gives so much energy to go on...and not just go on but do it with joy!
Please, don´t lose faith!